May 7th, 2009: During the past few days, I’ve been on a very unpleasant rollercoaster with my pain medication. After a couple of days of upping my dosage to 200 mcgs per day, I suddenly realized that I was way over-cooked. I felt drugged but not high. It was like I was suddenly my own science experiment. A few more drops here, ooops, too much! I slept for 12 hours a day, and I couldn’t concentrate to meditate or do any imaging. Other times, I felt a lot of physical discomfort. What a dreadful spot! I was over my limit with opiates and still in pain.

After talking with my therapist, it became clear that I need more information about pain management. So far, I have been relying on medication to do the heavy lifting, and I seem to be at the far edge of that strategy. So, what to do? That’s what I could find out in a pain clinic.

After much discomfort, I took off one of my 100 mcg patches and applied a 50 mcg dose. So today I am back to the 150 amount and feeling better for it. Today, I feel almost normal. However, I am still shaken by recently pitching so far into the zone of pain alternating with over-doped.